Hell....

Today I feel like I am living in Hell.  I can smell the fire, feel its heat burn my skin and hair and pulling me downward.

This is what has happened recently that I just don’t feel prepared or want to deal with…

• Friend in the process of losing her father to cancer and feeling utterly helpless
• Audit at work
• School – seriously my professor is an idiot who thinks we should already know everything he is supposed to teach us and therefore talks about bowel movements, regrets, religion, etc. 
• Losing a resident I was close with
• Being with someone who doesn’t want to date me but doing what I consider “dating” things
• Being torn because I want above individual to find an awesome job because he really deserves it, but not wanting him to leave. 

I know that I am just going through a rough patch as does everyone else.  I also realize that this is minimal compared to people losing loved ones and/or dealing with what society feels is a bigger burden.  But honestly, I just want to shut my door and cry.  It is when I am stressed like this that I am really, really jealous of my family/friends that are married because they have someone that truly cares about their well-being and wants to do things to make their life easier.  Whether it be bringing over ice-cream to noticing that life has dealt you a hard hand and they want to hold yours until it gets better.  Or just cuddling with them and having them actually cuddle you back...  :(

Okay, I am done.  Back to work before I drown further in my own sorrows!! 

Lobster Feast!!

Finally, I felt like a real East Coast person!  I decided it was time I learned how to cook a lobster!  I went to Wegman's (my favorite grocer here) and grab about six of the best looking ones for dinner.

I invited Rosalie, Brennan and Andy over to be a part of the feast!  I was really nervous driving from the grocer home because I was feeling bad about jostling the lobsters around so much and told them I was sorry that I planned on eating them.  I only named one - George - he kept me company as I explained I hadn't done this before and hoped it wasn't painful.

Andy came over a little early to help me with the first round of lobsters...  He made me cut the rubber bands off and place them in the pot to be steamed myself.  He claimed it was because this was my idea to cook these up, but I think he was much afraid of getting pinched as I was!  George was the first one in the pot because I was afraid if he wasn't, I would have a pet lobster living in my bathtub! I only came close to getting pinched when #5 was going in and swung his massive claw back at me...  I may have screamed a little and jumped around almost throwing him back in the sink...  Andy quickly reminded me that if I threw him in there I had to get him back out!  Eek!  I did NOT want that to happen and jumped over to the stove where I was able to get him in the pot. 

I very quickly became a pro steamer of lobsters!  They were sooooooooo  delicious!!!  Yumm..  Might need to go pick some more up soon!  :)

I remember taking pictures of my putting them in the steaming pot, but I have no idea where they ended up.  I found it fascinating to put a brown lobster in the pot and pull out a bright red one!!  It felt like they were mood lobsters - red color meaning "Eat Me!!" 

Overall, it was a really fun night.  We gabbed, played with the skeletons and just enjoyed each other's company.  It was so nice and relaxing! 


 

Redskins Game!

Andy and I attended the Washington Redskins game on September 23.  I purchased the tickets at the Silent Auction from the Gala because who couldn't pass up these awesome seats!

The first time I went to a game it was in December and I took Andrew (Erin's husband) we F - R - O - Z - E to death!!  It was so cold we ended up leaving early...  So, I was a tad nervous because I don't have the best of luck for things like this!

But the day was perfect!  Not to hot that I felt like the plastic was going to melt into my butt, but not so cold that I couldn't feel my toes! 

I am a total people watcher and there were a TON of people to watch!  A couple of girls totally started punching each other and had to be escorted out by security!  It was fun!  Oh yeah, and then there was a game to watch! 

They had a pretty fun fight/touchdown song to sing...  I kept waiting for the part at the end where we pretend to milk the cow...  but sadly, I wasn't at a USU Aggies game...  and apparently they are to sophisticated to have actions with their fight songs!

To be honest, I don't remember if they won or not... but it was well worth it!  :) 

2012 Gala

The theme for this year's Gala was, "Enduring Valor: Illuminating Traditions of Excellence."  Pretty snazzy, right?  I swore off of doing the silent auction last year and had trained Molly to take over.  Well, Molly decided she liked doing the Silent Auction so much that she wanted to be in charge of the ENTIRE Gala!  Crazy - right!?  (She actually joined our Development team in July and is now over the events for our Foundation.) 

So, being the friend that I am I said I would handle the Silent Auction again this year, but only if I could have Erin helping me.  They quickly agreed and I went to work on ideas of how to present the items.  I spent a ton of time looking at DIY blogs, Pinterest, Michael's to form ideas of how I wanted it to look.  I already knew the colors I wanted and just needed a inviting and creative way to combine everything.  Molly and I had already discussed the previous year about using frames to hold the descriptions of the Silent Auction items and I liked it! 

Erin and I met pretty regularly or were constantly on the phone with ideas and colors and she spent hours and hours at stores purchasing everything.  She also was very instrumental in keeping the design simple and elegant.  She painted all of the frames, candlestick holders, decorative balls, little wooden sticks...  Seriously, so much help!!  We spent a few late nights at the office putting together the descriptions and frames (we were there one night until 3 AM).  But it created a very relaxing environment for the day of the event. 

In the process of getting ready for the Gala, it was announced that it was going to be Black Tie optional...  Oh dear, that meant a floor length dress and it had to be nice.  Luckily, Macy's pulled through and my dress ROCKED!  Major thanks to my mother's surprise visit on my birthday, she took the dress home and took off about 5-6 inches since I am a shorty!  Seriously, I put it on and felt like a princess!  Having never been to Prom, this was my night to get all dressed up and just have fun... 

 So, here are a few pictures from the event.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I couldn't have pulled it off this year if I didn't have Erin with me!  She calmed me down when I was angry and helped me stay calm when my nerves were getting the best of me!  THANK YOU SIS!   :)  I am waiting for Erin to send me the pictures she took on her phone of the two of us - our tradition for the last FIVE Galas!!

My 30th Birthday "Cruise"

My 30th birthday came bright and early...  I got up around 6ish to hit the zoo's new exhibit and then ended up going there again in the afternoon to enjoy the zoo with my family before heading to Erin's for the pool party.  For my birthday, I was informed that I could go to lunch in a restaurant of my choosing (a nice present from my parents)!  I was so excited to go anywhere, only I didn't realize how hard it is working around hungry kids and a pregnant sister!  So it was decided to save that for another day.

Due to the running around in the afternoon and my terrible timing - I was running late...  And I HATE running late!  I drove like a madman to Erin's house knowing I had people there waiting for me to arrive...  I felt TERRIBLE! 

Finally, we pull into the driveway and I grabbed everything from the car and rushed inside.  As soon as Erin spotted me she insisted she bring out the cake....  I hadn't even put down my purse or said hello to my friends!  I told her we could wait a little bit and then sing, but she told me we were doing cake NOW!  I thought it was weird and then in she came - with no cake - but the cake was behind her being carried by - - - - - -   MY MOTHER!!! 

The surprise brought me to tears - I mean who WOULDN'T cry!!! - I sobbed for probably a good 5 minutes.   Then I noticed that Aunt Pam was there too - I couldn't have asked for a better birthday present!  I had my two moms there!  :)

(It should be mentioned that my father even kept this a secret from me!! Way to go Dad!)

My family had decked out the Kitchen and Living Rooms to look like a cruise ship deck and I was in heaven!  The lights on the ceiling where my favorite - thanks Dru!  Here are some pictures to show you just how amazing everything was that night!  BEST BIRTHDAY EVER!!! 

I couldn't believe the friends that traveled far and near just to celebrate with me - I won't ever forget!  I am so blessed!  Enjoy some shots courtesy of Cassie!  :)

Birthday Eve!

Tomorrow is going to happen no matter how hard I try to stop time! 

I haven't completed any of the lifetime goals I always thought I would have completed well before I hit the big 30!!  So, I did what any rational 29 year-old did and started a pity party for myself.  I looked at pictures from family/friends college graduations, weddings, of their children and just thought about how different my life would be if I had completed all of my goals. 

Then while I was packing to move, I found a letter I wrote at age 15 to my future self for a Young Women's Personal Progress goal.  The letter was sweet and my handwriting was adorable (did you expect anything less)! 

One of the first things I told myself was not to put myself down, I was a good person and shouldn't be so hard on myself.  I talked about what to look for in a future spouse and how I wanted them to be loving and good too.  I talked about how important it is for me to remember who I am and to pray (a saying my mother always said, guess it stuck). 

Reading the letter full of wisdom (seriously, I was an awesome kid) stopped the pity party.  I realized that I couldn't let down the 15 year-old me just because I wasn't where I thought I would be.  Funny how the younger me ended up giving the "old" me a new perspective... 

So, Happy Birthday to me!  Besides, 30 is the new 20 - right!?

Moved....

I moved into my own apartment this last weekend and so far I LOVE it!!

I know that my family is nervous to have me in my own place and for some valid reasons.  I just want everyone to know that I know this was a right step for me.  It is going to take some time to adjust, but I am so much closer to friends, church and school.

I had to laugh because while talking to my parents one night, my dad informed me that he looked up the address on Google Earth and stated that the parking lot looks really nice.  Ha ha!  Considering my dad's computer skills, I was really touched!

The move was nothing short of a miracle!  Four years ago I left Utah and pretty much everything fit in the back of my little car.  NOW - I filled a Uhaul truck, friends truck, Dru's work van, friends sedan and still have a couple of things left!

The night before I moved I couldn't sleep because I was so stressed that I would be alone until I had a couple of confirmed helpers coming after they got off work.  I was planning on it just being me and how I would have to walk to get the Uhaul because I didn't have anyone to drive my car back.  I finally fell asleep around 3 am...  5:45 am came all too early!! 

I got to work and was trying to stay focused on getting through my half day...  Then the miracles started happening! 

Long story short - at my townhouse I ended up having four strong missionaries, two friends that worked a half day at work and one awesome bro-in-law.  Everything kept flying out the doors and into the various vehicles for transportation and the missionaries kept it fun even it if was at my expense!  I told the Elders multiple times that girls are allowed to have lots of shoes and purses - I was preparing them for marriage!

Once we arrived at the new place it was just John, Paul and me to haul things up the four flights of stairs (no elevator)...  I was exhausted, sweaty and praying that I could make it up the stairs one more time.  Then when I was about to just bag it for the day and send the guys home, friends from the church started showing up and gave me the extra boost I needed.  The rest of the boxes flew up the stairs and before I knew it I just had the couch, giant TV and piano (yes, piano...). 

I ran to grab a friend that came on the metro and while I was gone the couch made it up the stairs - although I am told that it was nothing short of a miracle.  Next was the TV, it took almost everyone to get it up the stairs - at one point it looked like my friend Danielle was carrying it all on her back!  After seeing how hard it was after the first flight of stairs, I told them to stop and I would just get rid of it...  I did NOT want anyone to get hurt!  But they pushed on and it made it all the way to the top!  The piano was last...  I was dreading this all night (as I am sure they were as well)!  Luckily, two Elders returned to help move the piano and I was grateful.  As we were standing at the door leading into the complex, a friend suggested we say a prayer before moving the piano any further.  I couldn't believe I didn't think of that!! 

Watching everyone gather and looking around at all my friends that came to help me, my emotions were running pretty high and I just started to cry.  A beautiful prayer was said and then the piano went up the stairs, I paced around outside...  I couldn't watch and wasn't helping at all....  I ran up the stairs when I heard cheering and clapping!  They did it!  I think I even started to cry again (hey, I was exhausted)... 

I broke out more water and we sat down and relaxed for a little bit.  I was informed that I was never allowed to move again!!  I agreed!!  When I came back from dropping off the Uhaul and a couple of friends, I walked into see my living room set up and boxes stacked along one side.  I walked into the bedroom and my bed was setup and made (sans the sheets)...  I did start to cry again because I was so exhausted and again overwhelmed with the amount of love I felt that day.  I collapsed and didn't even hear the alarm the next morning...  It was better than anything I could have imagined at that point! 

I couldn't believe how well everything ended up!  I had an outpouring of love and support from friends in the church and I truly feel blessed. 

SO!  Friends and Family - stop by anytime I would love to have you come and check out the new place!  :)